Embracing Change/Transition
Are you or someone you love currently experiencing a life transition? No matter what your individual lived circumstances, you have probably experienced your fair share of change and transitions (i.e. moving to a new city, starting a new school/education program, learning a new hobby/skill, becoming a parent (or pawrent), starting or ending a relationship, changing career paths, etc.) that likely brought about feelings of discomfort and excitement. As we all know, None of us are granted a life that will stay the exact same and change is part of the human experience.
As a counselor who specializes in working with young adult populations, many of the clients I see are seeking therapy while also navigating a recent/anticipated life transition. As is such, I often have conversations with clients regarding how best to navigate change and surrender to the process when possible. If you have found yourself in a recent life transition or are preparing for a new season of life, below are some thoughts that might be helpful as you ride the wave of change:
REMEMBER THAT PERSPECTIVE IS EVERYTHING:
If you’re in a transitioning period and are concerned about your next steps, ask yourself what is truly within your locus of control. Critically evaluating this may help to alleviate any anxiety you are having about the future and will help clear your mind to focus on what’s really important during this time period. Try to start each day with a grounding/centering exercise and allow yourself to decide what you would like to focus your energy on and how this will be helpful towards your next transition.
BE PROACTIVE WITH FREE TIME:
I bet you’re like me and you consistently have a to-do list of areas in your house you’d like to clean out or little projects you keep pushing aside. So use your newly found down time and be proactive! Create something new as a small pick me up or go through old piles of clothes and sell them for cash. That way, when you suddenly don’t have any free time on your hands you’ll have a sense of accomplishment and gratitude for yourself for getting things done while you had the extra time.
MAKE A LIST OF VALUES:
I see this concept as two-fold. Whether you are between jobs or are simply curious about your options (related to moving, relationships, etc.), I feel that it is critical to evaluate your personal values and to see if they align with your future/present decisions. Doing so can help you to make the best decision for your next “big” move and to ensure that you pick the best choice for you rather than settling for something that isn’t the right fit. Additionally, making a list of your own personal values or attributes can serve as a self-esteem boost and can help to re-establish confidence in yourself as times of transition can often be scary and increase self-doubt.
REACH OUT TO YOUR SUPPORTS:
Again, no matter where you are on the career/life spectrum, reach out to your contacts! You never know what opportunities you may discover or what ideas a conversation will spark for you. Once people know you are thinking about a career change they may keep their eyes and ears open for new opportunities that you otherwise may miss out on! Even if you are a seasoned vet in your field it is still helpful to maintain good relationships with folks in your community who offer similar services. Similarly, don’t forget the people who have been consistent and have showed up for you during times of change. Remember to reach out and to lean on your social supports as they can be helpful in providing good insight, feedback, and suggestions if this is what you need.
BE INTENTIONAL WITH BEHAVIORS:
Fill your new free time with something new or something useful. Try reading a book instead of scrolling through your feed or watching Netflix. If you are struggling with how to spend your time during this transitional period, try asking yourself one of these guiding questions?
-How do I want to remember this time period?
-How can I support myself during this season of life? What kind of support (s) feel most helpful to me right now?
-What routines feel helpful to me right now? Which ones no longer serve me? How can I make adjustments and meet in the middle?
-How have I been treating myself recently?
-What parts of the day feel overwhelming? What helps me to manage this?
-How can I prepare for this next season of change/newness?
-What am I worried about? What am I excited about?
-Are my thoughts balanced?
-What is within my control? What do I need to let go of?
-How do I want to prioritize my mental health and wellness?
I hope you found these reflections helpful. If your transitional period feels overwhelming and you are in need of assistance, please don’t hesitate to reach out via email (vbcounselingcollective@gmail.com) or phone (757) 434-5811.
